Sometimes... on days like today, I feel like I'm just wasting space.
I have no real purpose here other than to go to work and earn money... I am the last to be thought of, I am not needed anywhere... I serve no useful purpose. And so my life is really... just being.
I have to live.
I know I have to get my mind to shift gears. I know I need to get out and enjoy who I am. To just live.
But talking about living and enjoying life and actually doing it is very different.
Somehow over the past few months I've regressed again. It's a dip in the remarkable year I've had... I know what this feels like. I think I might have itchy feet again... I need to find something to do that will make me happy... I know that whenever I feel like this it's because there is something in my life that I am unsatisfied with.
Must figure out what that is.
I cannot keep going on like this, always up and down like a swing... feeling great and then feeling like shit... and then feeling good and then feeling useless... feeling like I don't belong anywhere.
There is a purpose for me. I just gotta figure out what that is.
