It's been 12mths to the day since we slept together and I never hear from him again. One day messages non stop, phone calls every night and then nothing. Dead silence.
I remember that night like it happened yesterday.
And I feel like an idiot for trusting him, for believing his lies. I hate that I didn't trust my gut and my head but I trusted my heart. Heart was wrong.
Big time wrong.
I know I don't know him, I know that I was used, I know that I was far too good for him, I know it's probably just because I want to know why, I want a reason from him, I've never been treated like this before and I know that I most likely only miss the feeling he gave me for that fleeting moment and not actually the person he was, yes rationally I know all of these things but fuck man, this feeling in the pit of my stomach really aches for missing him. And it feels really real.
I don't want to miss him. I want to call him and confront him, I have a million things I want to say to him and a million more ques9to ask him but I know that it won't change anything. He doesn't want me and I need to accept it. But my neurotic mind will not let it up.
And I regret so much.
I hate that I let him make me feel this way.
STOP!
I want it to all stop.
I want to move on with life without thinking of that jerk for a full day.
Just stop now.
I cannot 😒
